The intro opens up with Alex, who is gagged and tied up, being filmed in the dark by a night vison camera
Alex:(muffled) What's up everyone? My name is Alex and welcome to the show! (scared) No! I knew I shouldn't have come to work, today! Oooogh! I'm sorry! Today we got Slender Man vs. Unwanted House Guest.
Unwanted House Guest:
Haven't seen me in a while?
I've seen you just fine
You took 5,028 breaths in your sleep last night
Where am I? Look at the window, see that parked black van?
Well, I look out my window and see you, Slender Man
Just surrender, damn!
When people see you they hide
When people see me they die
You got no eyes and no help from the moonlight
Lights off, game on,
Grab your leg, Om Nom Nom
This ain't no fiction, no pretend
In the end, YOU'LL BE DEAD
Not afraid of the dark? I like a challenge
But watch your step, you might trip over your parents
Don't you dare get blood on my armani suit
Killin is my motherfuckin hobby, dude!
You got no chance, better start surrendering
So let's dance, every day I'm Slendering
I'll run circles around you
Tie you up and bound you, in the lake, I'll drown you
Your face looks like shit, manure
I got more facial expressions than Kristen Stewart
You got dying teeth, oh the irony
Without a face, I still look better than you, see?
See no wonder why nobody wants you, you like a more cracked out version of Gary Busey